Bleep bloop blop blorp
Wanna see me tap dance?
You don’t know how to tap dance.
What do you mean I don’t know how to tap dance?
I mean you’re full of shit. You can’t tap dance.
What do you call this then?
…
Tap-tuh-tap-tap-too-tuh-tap-tap.
Seriously?
Tap-tap-tip-top-tap-too-tuh-tap-tap.
You’re not even-
Tap-tap-tip-tuh-tap-too-tip-tuh-tap.
You’re just wagging your legs and saying “tap-tap”!!
Pretty good, right?
Are you serious?
I’ve been practicing.
Oh my god. You’re so dumb.
I’ve got talent.
You’ve got mental problems.
No, I don’t.
You’re standing there with that stupid, blank face that you always make, and you’re saying “tap-tap” over and over. You’re barley even moving.
Did you say “barley” or “barely”?
… “Barely”.
I think you said-
Look, I said what I said, okay? You can’t tap dance.
I can tap dance better than you.
I never said I could tap dance.
So I win.
No, you don’t.
Yes. I do. That’s how that works.
Just because you can do something that someone else can’t? That’s not how that works.
Well, I just tap danced so clearly I win.
This is so pointless.
It’s the facts.
You’re-alright, fine. Whatever. You win.
So I’m good, right?
No! Jesus, you’re not even good at that. You failed. You lose. You lose at life.
Clearly, I don’t.
Stop saying that!
Saying what?
“Clearly”. Stop saying that. Saying that before you make a point doesn’t make it any less stupid. It just makes you look like an ass. A “tap dancing” asshole.
…
…
Tap-tap-tuh-tap-
No! Don’t. Don’t even start.
I think if I tap dance fast enough I could travel back in time.
Good god, will you listen to yourself. Shut up.
Could be possible.
No. It can’t. It really can’t.
Anything’s possible until it isn’t.
Yeah, but here’s the thing – you can’t time travel just by tap dancing.
Are you an expert on physics?
No, but I’m an expert on stupid shit that’s impossible.
You’re impossible.
Wow.
Wow.
This is how it’s gonna be now?
This is how it’s gonna-
…
OW!
Be quiet.
Why’d you hit me?
Because you’re being an ass.
These are serious questions we’re discussing here. It’s up to young minds like ours-
…
STOP!
You stop.
Don’t slap me. That hurt.
Be. Quiet.
Alright, fine.
…
…
Where’s Tom?
Probably in the front.
Does he know we’re here?
I don’t know.
When does this thing start, anyway?
Does it matter?
I guess not.
Jesus, man.
I’m gonna call him.
Don’t even do it.
Why?
Because it’s a God damn funeral, man. Just shut it.
Fine.
…
…
Is there gonna be food afterwards? I’m starving.
I hate you.
